It Just Hit Me!

It truly just hit me that I HAVE to do this.  I need it.  I have really lost so much structure because of this.

My weight has ALWAYS been an issue - and last year (after the birth of my 2nd daughter) I joined Weight Watchers.  My starting weight was 239.6.  After 16 weeks, I was down 49 lbs.  By October 16, I was on vacation with my hubby celebrating our 5 year wedding anniversary - and I weighed 183 lbs.  AWESOME!!  I really felt awesome.  And then guess what.... I just fell off the wagon.  Halloween came & went.  Swore I was going back to Weight Watchers.  Then came Thanksgiving.  Swore I was going back to Weight Watchers.  Then came Christmas.  Swore I was going back to Weight Watchers.  New Years.

And then Monday.

This past Monday I decided to go to a meeting a get back on track - and guess what.... I ate Mac&Cheese today, a few bowls of cereal, and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.  WTF?!?  Why?  Truth is, I had an emotionally crappy day.  My "Auntie Flow" came for her visit.  and a butt load of other excuses I want to give!

So, enough is enough!  I want to stick with it.  I really do.  Matter a fact:

I GOTTA STICK WITH IT

I have 2 little girls who need a happy healthy mommy!  I want that feeling of control back!  For some reason I am letting garbage food control me.  Even foods that I don't really want.  How dumb!

I remember a Weight Watcher leader told me once:  If you spilled some wine on your carpet today, would you clean it up or just say "screw it" and dump the whole bottle (since it is already messed up)?

So tonight, I am going to just clean up my mess and move forward... no bottle on the carpet for me.  I think I am going to make some pork tenderloin, red cabbage and asparagus.  I was thinking brown rice -- but I have had PLENTY of carbs for the month!

And when my husband gets home, I think I need to clean out my pantry.  I just need a good clean start!  Ok, here goes...